As we get deeper and deeper into building our own house, it has become pretty obvious what things I am glad we did before we started and what things I wish we had done. I decided to make a list so you guys could see what made a big difference. I also included 3 things I didn’t expect because they have been on my mind lately.
- Take our time– Building our own house has been one of the most complicated things I have ever done. Mostly that is because I knew absolutely nothing about building a house. So, not only did I have to organize and manage a house being built, I was also learning everything as I went. Because of this, taking our time and refusing to rush things has been one of the best decisions we have made. Every time we put a deadline on anything, no matter how small, it becomes so stressful I can hardly get anything else done. If I could make one single suggestion to someone building their own home, it would be to allow as much time as possible to your project. Take the time to learn, to research, to call, and to shop, so that you can feel completely comfortable with each step as it comes.
- Saved up the money– I am so glad Farmer and I decided to wait to build until we had the money saved up. Because we didn’t take out a loan, we now have three comfortable years to finish our house. Hopefully it doesn’t take that long, but at least we don’t have the rushed one year deadline of a construction loan hanging over our heads. It’s hard to see the money fly out the window so fast on huge purchases that cost tens of thousands of dollars, but at least we know it’s money earned for this purpose. I have nothing against people taking out loans to build a house, I just want to tell you how nice it’s been to not have to deal with that aspect of building when there are so many other things to worry about. For me, it was absolutely worth 8 years of pinching pennies!
- Lived in other houses– Farmer and I have lived in four different houses together, it you count when we lived with his parents for a month. The first was a two bedroom apartment on two levels. The second was his parents one story farm house. The third was a three bedroom cabin from a kit. And the fourth, which we are living in right now while we finish the new house, is a large, but older two story home with lots of space. In every house we have stayed in, I have learned of things I dislike in a house and things I like. I would have never known some of these had I not lived in a few other homes before building. I learned that I wanted everything on one level. I also learned that I wanted large bedrooms with walk in closets. I learned that I wanted the kitchen, dining, and living room to be one big great room. And I learned that we NEED an office. I could keep going, but those are the big ones. What I thought I wanted 8 years ago in my dream home has changed drastically since living in four other homes that were all different and unique. If you don’t have the option of living in other homes, try to pay very close attention to other peoples homes you visit often, and ask them what they like and dislike.
- Made a commitment to be firm and decisive– One of the things I read about when learning how to be our general contractor was that I would need to be tough sometimes. I may need to fire someone, and I would certainly have to firm with people at the very least to make sure I didn’t get walked all over. This is not something that comes naturally to me! I am a people pleaser. I hate making people sad or uncomfortable. So this was something that I had to consider for a long time before I decided I could do it. I am glad that I made this decision before we started because from day 1, there were instances where I needed to be firm and make sure I was heard and treated fairly. At times I was treated quite rudely because I wasn’t an experienced general contractor. Some people didn’t want to deal with me, and some people tried to take advantage of someone who didn’t know what they were doing. To be your own general contractor and build your own home, you must decide that you can be tough when you need to be. I haven’t had to fire anyone yet and I am crossing my fingers I never have to, but if that day comes, I have decided that I can handle it.
- Made changes to our house plans– Towards the end of getting our house plans drawn up, I started to feel a little impatient. Part of me just wanted to accept them as they were and to quit worrying about all of the little changes I was making to perfect them. But I knew that it would be hard and more expensive to make changes later on so I kept at it until the plans were exactly how I wanted them. Since we have been building, it has become very obvious how big of a deal it was to get the blueprints perfect. Every single little change makes such a difference. Even half an inch changes everything. Moving a door, or a window, or adding insulation may not feel like a big deal, but it is. It takes time, and time is money. Sometimes those “small changes” effect larger things. Take the time to plan out your house on paper to exactness. Fix every tiny little thing that you don’t like, BEFORE submitting them for review. You will be happy you did it!
- Planned every single thing out– Once you break ground and everything starts moving forward quickly, decisions are thrown at you left and right. How do you want to dig the foundation? How high do you want the front steps? Where do you want your electrical box to be? Etc, etc. I planned out every thing I could think of before we started, down to what handles I wanted on the draws in the bathroom. I thought I had thought of everything! But even though I had worked my way through every inch of that house, there were still things I couldn’t have forseen before we began building the thing. Everything you do, and everyone you talk to, will have questions that only you can answer. If you don’t know the answers to those questions when they are asked, you are wasting time and money. For example, while we were trying to get our power hooked up I was asked by the public utility district how many AMPS of power we would need. If I had made that decision before hand, it would have saved us a weekend of me making phone calls and we would have had our power hooked up a week sooner. Although there are plenty of things I didn’t think of, I am so glad that I walked myself through the entire house and made all of the decisions that I could before we started. It made it a lot faster and easier when I was asked things like where the plumbing pipe needed to exit the foundation, and where I wanted the crawl space access to be.
- Shopped hard– One of the scarier parts of being our general contractor is finally having to decide who to hire and where to purchase our materials. A weight is taken off my shoulders every time I shop hard enough to feel completely confident in my decision. When you have talked to ten different companies, it’s easy to know you found the right guy for the right price. Even though it took months, I am glad I took the time to shop for every single contractor that would work on our house. For the most part, I was able to hire people that I know will do a good job, and I trust their opinions and advice. One of the best things you can hope for when building a house, is having people working on it that make you sleep better at night because you have no doubt they are doing you right.
- Got Farmer and I on the same page– Someone once told me that if you can make it through building a house with your spouse, you can make it through anything. I laughed when I heard it, but there is some truth to it. It can be a very trying thing on your relationship if you are not careful about it. Farmer and I are both pretty easy going people, but there were definitely a few things we disagreed on. Before we started building we took the time to discuss what things were most important to us on this house. We also talked about what realistically we should expect and what things we needed to be careful of. Communication beforehand, has made a smoother process when we are in the thick of it. Sort things out before you start, write it down if you have to, but do it!
- Gone to home shows- I wish we would have gone to a few home shows before building our dream home. There are always new ideas and smart changes when it comes to home building. Going to home shows would have let us in on a few of those things, and also allowed us to see things in person. It’s one thing to think you know what you want, and it’s another thing to see it in front of you.
- Put in a well early– We decided to wait to drill our well until later because we didn’t think we would need it until just before the house was finished. We discovered it would have come in handy to have water available on site long before you need working sinks and flushing toilets. We needed water to wet down the site before excavation. We needed water on concrete pouring day. We needed water to wash our hands after painting the foundation with tar. We needed water to keep the dust down while framing. We ended up stringing 400 feet of hoses across the canal to a pond for water. It was quite the project and annoying to have to drive around to turn it on and off. If I did it over again, we would put our well in first thing.
- Talked to more people who had built their own– The most valuable information I have received throughout the whole process has been from other people in my area who have done the same thing. They figured things out, learned secrets, found the lowest prices, and dealt with all the same rules as I had to figure out on my own. We talked to a few people that had built their own house, but not enough. I wish I would have taken the time to sit down with anyone I could find that had gone through it all to pick their brain. I would have learned quite a few more time saving and money saving secrets with a lot less work on my part.
- Started even earlier– We met with our house designer about a year before breaking ground and started working on permits shortly after that. While I am happy with the amount of planning we put into it before starting, I know that more time would have saved us more money. The last month or two before ground breaking day was chaotic. I spent time every day trying to get things lined up and a few times I settled for something simply because I didn’t have time to keep shopping or to research it more. To keep the process stress free, I would suggest house plans and building permits be started 18 months before you plan to break ground. If you get done early, that’s great! But if you don’t, you won’t feel rushed when you are waiting on other people to do their jobs.
- Written down a schedule and budget– Because I didn’t feel like I knew what I was doing, I didn’t know how to write up a schedule or a budget really. I had no idea what each step would entail, let alone how long it would take. I also didn’t have the foggiest idea of what things would cost. Even if you don’t know much of anything on this subject, start with when you want to start and finish. Fill in what you know, and keep filling it in as you learn. It would have been valuable to have even a rough outline of when we wanted to start, when I wanted to have it framed, and when I wanted to start the finish work. Keep a calendar and a budget even if it’s not very specific.
- The extra expenses– I knew there would be extra expenses and I planned for them, but I didn’t think it would be anywhere near what it is. The biggest ones have been fuel, supplies, and food. We live in the country so driving anywhere takes quite awhile. The hardware store is about 45 minutes away from our new house, and I have needed to go there 3-4 times a week. That adds up quick, especially when we weren’t even going to town once a week before. Thank goodness the new house is only half a mile down the road or else that would make quite a difference on fuel too since I go there multiple times every day. I have also been surprised by how many random supplies we would need all the time, which is why I have to go to the hardware store so much. Almost every day we need something like saw blades, chalk, more nails, duct tape, etc. No you don’t have to go every single day, but sometimes if you wait to go the next day, the work is put on pause. And the third big one has been food. This is directly related to how many times I have been going to town to get supplies. With four young kids, I can’t just go for hours without food. I wish I had planned better for this time and made freezer meals ahead. It would have saved us quite a bit more money than I thought. Many times every week I find myself picking up pizza or driving through taco bell which I normally wouldn’t do. We are spending way more money on fast food than we ever have in the past.
- How fun it would be– It honestly never crossed my mind that this whole thing would be so much fun. I planned on it being hard work and lots to do, but not necessarily exciting. Maybe not everyone would feel this same way, but I have loved meeting so many new people. I have loved taking my kids around to places with me to help and learn. I have loved being a part of building our house. I have loved learning how to do new things that used to scare me like pouring concrete. It’s been exciting to be a part of this big project and to contribute to the home we will live in forever.
- How hard it would be to deal with people– I thought it would be easier to find trustworthy people that honestly want to help. Don’t get me wrong, there are plenty of them out there and I didn’t stop looking until I found them! But, there are also way more dishonest and sneaky people than I had imagined. Dealing with people that don’t have your best interest in mind, is really hard, especially when you don’t always know what you are doing. It was harder than I thought it would be to find people that I could trust and that were easy to deal with. More often than not, I was making phone calls all day trying to figure out how to deal with the latest disaster because someone did something they shouldn’t have. Take the time to find trustworthy people to work on your house, it makes all the difference.
Overall, I am so happy Farmer and I decided to build our own house. Because I am the general contractor, we have already been able to save over $65,000 and we are only about half way done. I didn’t know anything about building, I was terrified to be the one in charge, but we decided to go for it and see how much money we could save.
Now, more than ever, I want to scream to the world that “you can do it”! You can be your own general contractor and you can save thousands on your home.
That’s the whole reason I started this website. The whole time we were preparing to start our house, I wished I could find someone that would walk me through the whole thing. I know there are people out there like me, wanting to know how to build their own house, even though they don’t know anything.
If you are interested in learning how we have saved $65,000 and how we are on track to build a $500,000 custom home for $300,000 then follow along with us on this journey. I have created several FREE house building checklists and schedules that I have used on our own house, including a budget breakdown so far.
Sign up here to receive all of that FREE information. No fees, no obligations, just FREE resources to help you build your own dream home.
~Farmer’s Wife
Chris Nelson says
Probably one of the biggest problems finding good people is price. No where is it more true you get what you pay for. Cheapest is almost a recipe for problems. Pay a fair price for good work. Contractors who do work cheap often aren’t busy & need the work to survive. There is a reason they are not busy & there is a reason the good contractors are busy & you have wait on them for an opening. If I can’t take pride in doing a job correctly because of cost or pricing restraints I won’t take it because I don’t need the practice & I don’t do it for free. It will be a disaster from the beginning.
farmerswife@therealfarmhouse.com says
Thank you for that wisdom Chris. You are absolutely right that cheap does not mean the best option. But, on the flip side, paying more doesn’t promise a better job, and I don’t think inexpensive always means problems. I think if you shop around enough you can find great quality for a great price.
It sounds like maybe you are in construction with “buildwithglobal”, is that correct? It’s always nice to get input from someone in the field who takes pride in their job. Thanks for the words of advice!
Moriah says
I love your advice on starting early, I have been researching for YEARS (though mostly more finish work than nitty-gritty) and I’m still learning and finding stuff that I like better or would do different!
I will caution though on getting your building permits to early. It depends on where you live and how your working the money but atleast here, once you receive your building permit you have between 6 months and a year (depending on which county) to START building and make reasonable progress. Not saying this to scare anyone, just saying, ask lots of questions before putting anything on the books!
Just something I thought I would share 🙂
farmerswife@therealfarmhouse.com says
Excellent advice, thanks Moriah.
Every county is different and every persons situation is different. Always make the phone calls, ask questions, and do your homework before jumping into anything. I agree 100%
Matt McKinney says
I have recently found local companies that buy back materials from large builders at auction prices. They resell to people like us for roughly 30 percent discount. It going to save me a ton of money on everything from doors to lumber.
farmerswife@therealfarmhouse.com says
Wow, great tip! I bet some people would want to know where you live or what those companies names are.
Thanks Matt
Berdie says
Yes please!
Nicole says
Habitat for humanity
Susan Hale says
Yes please
Leah h says
I have questions for you about your well. I don’t know anything really just that our house we bought 11 years ago has doubled in value and we wanna sell to move to the country. We have been looking at land it’s very expensive I have found some more affordable land but they have no water or no electric. Even if I could get city water I love the idea of having a well. Water in our city has really gone up it. A well is the best option what advise do u have for me on learning about cost of having a well.
farmerswife@therealfarmhouse.com says
Hey Leah,
Wells vary a ton in cost according to where you live, the type of soil/rock in your area, and how deep they have to drill. In the past two years we have had experience with three different wells all within 1 mile of each other. One well was only 40 feet deep, another was 120, and the third was over 600 feet. The cost difference was more than $10,000 and this was all very close to each other. My point is that you really don’t know what is going to happen with your particular well. The BEST way to get a close estimate is to call a few different well drillers in your area and ask them about it. You will also need to find a few of the nearest wells to where you would be drilling yours and find out the depth. If your next door neighbor has a well, you can hope that your well should be close to the same depth as theirs. Well drillers charge by the foot so if something happens and they have to drill forever to hit water then you will be paying a pretty penny and there is no way out of that. You can get a close estimate, but just be prepared in case it doesn’t work out quite the way you hoped.
Just as a ball park for you to consider- to drill our 120 foot well cost a little over $6,000. To have the pump installed cost another $5,000. The well I mentioned earlier, 1 mile away from us, had to be drilled over 600 feet and cost around $20,000. I hope that’s helpful!
Paula says
We are planning on building a home in the next 5 years. 5years?!?!you may ask. Well, we are budgeting, and I am a huge budgeter. HUGE.
Anyway, back to my point, the number 1 thing we have done so far, is to talk to our future neighbors. We pretty much just went over and introduced ourselves. We talked about what our plans were for the property, and that we would be taking our time. They had tons of suggestions and told us some of the problems they had when they built their homes. We now have a heads up on a huge issue that we can plan and budget for.
farmerswife@therealfarmhouse.com says
Great suggestion! Thanks Paula
Christina Penn says
Good Morning from Massachusetts!!
My family and I want to build a family compound. About 20,000 sq ft. We are looking at land in North Carolina. It will be a total of 3 families. Husband and I , our Son and future wife, our Daughter and son in law. No babies as of yet but they all want to have at least 3 to 4 babies. We are all in school as of right now and will be done in 5 years. At that time we would like to have already purchased our land 5 to 10 acres and have the building process started. We all really want to help build this home. Now can you give suggestions??
Thank you,
Christina
farmerswife@therealfarmhouse.com says
Wow, that sounds great! Big project to take on but super fun.
My best advice is to start actively planning right now. 5 years may seem like a lot of time right now, but the worst thing you can do is tell yourself you have plenty of time to plan later. I started planning almost 2 years out and I wish I would have had more time. I thought that was plenty of time, but there were a lot of things I didn’t research or think about.
If you make a plan now, you and your children’s families will have lots of time to make changes and decide what exactly it is that you really want. It also provides extra time for you to shop, find deals, and save money.
Lesley P says
Before you buy land in NC, make sure the soil can pass a “perc” test. It will determine if thesoil can accommodate a sufficient drainage field to handle the septic tank output for the number of people you plan to house on the property. In Casswell Co, NC a couple bought land for a home without a perc test or investigating if one had already been done. It had and the acerage failed for a home site. The land has been for sale for 4 yrs.
farmerswife@therealfarmhouse.com says
Thanks Lesley!
Colette says
I am in the dreaming stages of wanting to build my own forever home. I stumbled on your site, and am really excited to learn more about what I want in a future home. One thing that I am taking into consideration is the need to live in more spaces before I do anything with plans and I am taking steps so that if/when I do choose to build my own home, it is done debt free! I am excited to see what I will learn on this journey. Thank you for being an inspiration for starting it the right way and especially for the tips that you are providing!
farmerswife@therealfarmhouse.com says
You are welcome Colette! Best of luck!